“Dad, we’re already running late!” you complain as you’re sure all your teammates are waiting for you at the championship game. My team can’t win the Championship without me! (In reality you ride the bench but your cheers are the loudest—Dad says it gets in the head of the other team). “Okay—I’ll take a shortcut” Dad replies. The car immediately turns on to a road that you think is someone’s driveway.
Dads have an ability to find “shortcuts” that no one else knows. Obviously since these shortcuts are So Dad, the short cuts actually make the trip longer. Dad’s shortcuts cut through neighboring alleys, side streets, and even someone’s backyard. Yet somehow missing the 3 stop signs and one street light doesn’t save any time because Dad’s shortcut isn’t a shortcut. Just because no one else knows this route doesn’t make it a shortcut.
The funny thing is, all Dads know the same shortcut. Yet you never see them taking the route at the same time. Ever notice Dads at a BBQ laughing by the grill? If they’re not talking football, golf or the latest way they embarrassed you, they’re discussing the newest shortcut they’ve discovered.
Eventually you make it to your destination to which Dad will say with a smirk “Good thing we took the shortcut or we’d still be driving.” Whatever you say Dad, whatever you say…
*The lesser known Dad shortcuts are those that involve hikes. These are dangerous as poison ivy and falling over tree branches are often involved. Beware*