Wednesday, May 25, 2011

#32 Gifts for you that Dad wants

"Here, open mine!" Dad proclaims. Dad's knees clatter with excitement and his upper body flails like yours after one too many pixie sticks. You start to untie the ribbon of the present Dad got you. The wrapping was obviously done by mom, but this present was especially picked out for you by Dad. You remove the box and there before you sits a present that you don't fully comprehend.
"You like it?"

Classic Dad. Dads tend to get their kids a gift that the kid doesn't necessarily want, but rather Dad buys it so he can relive his childhood or try out the latest toy without feeling guilty. These gifts range from Train sets, Legos, complex model airplanes meant for an age group you're not part of, to even Easy Bake ovens (this way Dad can sneak in brownies without mom knowing). Sometimes the gifts are too random to even make sense: a new bed comforter, a matching belt, or next year's social studies book and Brain Quest set.

"Oh...thanks Dad. I love it."
"LET ME SHOW YOU HOW IT WORKS" Dad quickly takes the present out of the box for a demonstration for all to see. Forget instructions, Dad has already memorized them at the toy store when the cashier demonstrated the gift in the first place. The demonstration continues to a round of out of rhythm applause while people scan the room for the birthday cake. "See! It's not only fun, but practical!"

You thank Dad with a big hug and set the present down with the others. At the end of the party you shove all the presents at the foot of your bed and lay down because your sugar high is finally wearing off. *Knock knock* "Want me to show you more of what that present can do?
I can tinker with it to make sure it runs right." Dad passively asks as he is already digging through the present pile. "Go ahead Dad, knock yourself out."
You've never seen that gift again.


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