Towels, check. Sunblock, check. Oversized tote bag, check.
You are ready for the beach. Dad, on the other hand, has a much bigger
checklist for his beach outings.
Sunblock, check. Extra sunblock, check. Bucket Hats, towels, coolers, sunglasses, croakies, windbreaker
(wait—what?), first aid kit, lawn chair, and socks with sandals.
Dad is now ready to conquer the beach.
For Dads, the beach isn’t just a place to bury your kids and make up false treasure maps that your kids still believe to
this day. The beach is a place to embarrass your kids while also teaching them
lessons. “Why does Dad have to wear that goofy hat and sunblock on his nose?” “BECAUSE
UV RAYS ARE SILENT KILLERS!”
While you enjoy the seashells and building sand castles, Dad
will stay back under the umbrella and observe the waves and current tide. Don’t
worry though, Dad chose your spot on the sand away from the current’s pull
incase you wanted to go into the water.
And when you’ve exhausted the day by somehow swallowing more
salt water and sand than your body weight, you waddle yourself over to the
beach showers. Dad, meanwhile, packs things up efficiently, showing no signs of
sand or having even been at the beach. “The secret is an extra pair of socks.”
And you wonder how Dad got so wise as you fall asleep on the drive home.
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